JOY to be grasped

Sometimes I don't understand why it is so hard for me to really embrace the JOY set before me. I am reminded of the passage of 1 Peter 1:8-9,
Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
I recognize my sin, confess it....but then I stay there. What does repentance really look like in the life of a believer? Someone really walking with the Lord? I mean I would consider myself walking daily with Him. I talk to him. I pray. Ask Him to help me in my weaknesses. And He does help me, but I do constantly find myself falling back into the same sin...and gosh, it is frustrating. I think my being conscious of this saps me of my JOY. I truly believe in 1 John 1:9 that "if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." Moreover, I see that I stand before the throne of God blameless, righteous and purified from all filthiness and sin because of Christ's blood shed for me. I give thanks that by the blood of Jesus, I can "draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water" (Hebrews 10:22). But I think that what I really struggle with is believing that....
His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. (2 Peter 1:3)
I pray that God would restore to me the JOY of my salvation daily as I fall before His throne knowing that I cannot and refuse to live this Christian life by my own strength. It is the divine power of the Holy Spirit in me that will give me all that I need for "life and godliness" and HOW I desire to please Him and let off the oh so pleasing aroma of Christ...as I am being transformed daily.